Not Bad At All

Sorry for not updating in a while.  I find that the more I lay around my house doing nothing (is it "lay around" or "lie around"?) the less I feel like doing anything.

 

After my initial elation at having the worst behind me and coming out of it looking pretty normal, my recovery kinda plateaued.  I have been in quite a bit of pain since my surgery and although it is certainly diminishing every day, it's more of an incremental daily reduction at this point - nothing dramatic.  After the first week or so, I got pretty fed up with being stiff and in pain all the time and I just wanted my life back. 

 

But there is good news too:  I took out my last drain on Saturday - I can finally get dressed without maneuvering around the plastic tubing emerging from my hips.  Since that drain came out, I have started to improve more significantly. 

 

And the boobs, well, for the first time last week I looked in the mirror and I thought "not bad at all" or as my French husband would say "pas mal de tout." (It sounds more convincing in French.)  I felt that I looked good on a visceral level, not just as an objective matter of aesthetics but that I actually liked the way I looked, that I could look forward to cocktail dresses and bikinis again, that perhaps I looked even better than I did before and I was actually pleased with the new me.  For one thing, the new girls aren't as droopy as the old ladies - I am so looking forward to going bra-less for the first time since I was fourteen!  And for another, the muffin tops on my hips were completely eliminated so that I now have a lean hourglass figure instead of my little zaftig silhouette.

 

The new boobs are truly some sort of modern miracle.  Basically sheets of fat were harvested from hips and transplanted to my chest to create new boobs.  Although they are not as soft as the real thing (but they seem to be softening up as the swelling recedes), they do have "movement" and "give" and if not for the scars I do not believe that these counterfeits could be differentiated from natural boobs visually or even by touch.  In short, they are a pair of masterful forgeries that I feel pretty lucky to own. 

 

Which I guess brings us to the punch line which seems rather odd - in the final analysis this whole mastectomy thing is just not as big of a deal as you would expect it to be.

 

Apart from the new set, I'm still me.  

Comments

[Steph H]

So glad to hear you a recovering well. Those drains are THE WORST. And you are absolutely right -- it's not that big a deal. Once you look back on life from the other side of surgery, you just think, geez, what was I working myself up about; I should have done this sooner.

[Janine]

Recovery is a bit of a pain but all in all, it is anticlimactic after surgery. My mind is not as messed up as I thought it would be. I guess all that worrying before surgery prepares us for the aftermath. Life goes on. Congrats on your new bod!

[Tobey]

Hi sweetie,
I just came home from work & was thinking about you, so I came here to take a peek & check up on you!I am thrilled to read about how well you are doing.
Be well...stay well.
x0x0
Tobey